If you live in Obereichstaett, Bavaria and something’s bugging you, it’s probably just the yearly march of hundreds of thousands of millipedes crawling through your village. The solution? Build a one foot high wall around the entire village, of course (no, seriously). Just remember, no matter how bad your day is bugging you, it’s probably not nearly as literal as what’s bugging these villagers…
Source: Fark
A man was severely injured (read: shot in both legs) when he fired a full load of double-ought buck shot at a wheel…because he couldn’t get the lug nut loose. Remember kids, a shotgun is a dangerous weapon, not to be used as a hammer or a wrench, unless you want to end up featured on NMHB.
Source: Fark
Man runs for city councilman and loses by one vote – bad day. Man loses election by one vote and it turns out his wife forgot to vote – classic NMHB fodder.
Source: Fark
There’s an old saying, “never bring a knife to a gunfight” – well, an Atlanta man learned the hard way not to bring a stun gun to a carjacking. The victim shocked his carjacker with the stun gun, and was shot five times in response to his trouble.
Source: Fark
Gina Partington of Greater Manchester has had quite the week. Her son’s body was found, she formally identified it as her son, and the body was cremated on October 30th. Except that her son was found alive in Nottingham four days earlier. It’s not clear whose body was cremated or why the police failed to tell her when they found her son before she had a funeral service for him and cremated someone else’s body.
Feeling under the weather? Well, if you think you’re going to be sick, it’s a good idea not to lean over a train platform to vomit – especially when a train is coming. A London woman found out the hard way that when train and head collide, the train wins. Amazingly, she survived with “only” a fractured skull, but I think it’s safe to say her day just got a lot worse.
I really don’t think I can do much better than Fark’s existing submitter headline for this story:
Wheelchair athlete misses New York Marathon because airline lost his wheelchair – AGAIN
Source: Fark
A Salvadorian man is suing the United States government after he was allegedly denied sufficient medical attention while in immigration detention. He alleges that his cancer would not have become terminal and he would not have had to have his penis amputated. if he had been provided proper care while being kept at the Immigration and Customs Enforcement detention center. So he’s in prison, he’s being deported, he’s got terminal cancer, and they amputated his penis to slow down the cancer. I’ve heard of cutting off your nose to spite your face but this is something else entirely…
Source: Fark
The ironically named dentist Dr. Trusty likes to break it down to the radio. Unfortunately for patient Brandy Fanning, the song “Car Wash” was on the radio as Dr. (not-so) Trusty went work on her molar. Now we all know how irresistible Car Wash is so who can blame him for dancing to it? It’s not like he was doing potentially dangerous, intricate work…
So, as I’m sure you’ve guessed by now, the story gets worse. I don’t know about the rest of you but *SNAP* followed by “oops” is not something I want to hear when someone is in the middle of drilling away inside my mouth. What was the snapping sound, you ask? It was a drill bit breaking off and lodging itself right next to the patient’s eye. Our Trusty doctor managed to lodge the drill bit even farther into a sinus bone while attempting to remove it using a metal hook, until finally admitting that Ms. Fanning really ought to be in an emergency room – immediately – since the bit was seriously in danger of blinding her. And I thought my dentist visits were rough.
Source: Fark
Today’s NMHB award has to go to James Harris of Tama, Iowa. While out bird hunting, he was shot by his own dog. Brings new meaning to the term “hunting dog” – just be sure that your dog isn’t hunting you!
Source: Philly.com
Well, my associate Jay Cross has already posted today’s NMHB but I just couldn’t resist adding this two-part illustration. First, why you should stay in school: so you can know the difference between right and left. I know what you’re thinking “well, anyone knows that” – well, evidently not the staff at a Karmanos Cancer Institute in Detroit. Seems they treated the wrong side of cancer patient’s brain with a “gamma knife”. So kids, remember: stay in school!
Source: Fark
Bonus:
I promised you a two-parter, so here it is. While you’re in school learning left from right, be sure to show your school spirit at sporting events. Say, by running over a cheerleader with the entire football team (warning: video goodness).
Source: CNN